0176-"Intervention" [4/19/07]

longlostposter · Post by **longlostposter** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 12:21 am

Don't forget that Daniel is stuck with Bree because he got himself involved with her situation with the Order, and now he can't get himself another girl. I mean, what female would put themselves in the position BJD are in? He's screwed, as far as finding happiness with a woman. He can't just go out and get another one...or even look, for that matter.

kwicherbichen · Post by **kwicherbichen** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 12:21 am

Lurker wrote:
kwicherbichen wrote:
longlostposter wrote:Trainer, can you get me in there? Every time I try to go in, it says I need to register, and I have already.
where is the chat??
Go to the main LG15.com page and you can access it from there (it's one of the options like "Forum"). You're supposed to be able to try getting in from the little navigation box here on the forum too, but it's glitchy for people, so try directly from the main page.

Did you see me in the chat? ^_^!!!

Lurker · Post by **Lurker** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 12:29 am

kwicherbichen wrote:
Lurker wrote:
kwicherbichen wrote: where is the chat??
Go to the main LG15.com page and you can access it from there (it's one of the options like "Forum"). You're supposed to be able to try getting in from the little navigation box here on the forum too, but it's glitchy for people, so try directly from the main page.
Did you see me in the chat? ^_^!!!

I don't believe so, no. I had forgotten my password for it, and by the time I got in there, DB was gone, so I didn't stick around.

longlostposter · Post by **longlostposter** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 12:32 am

Nice way to rub it in, Kwicherbiten.

CRYISME · Post by **CRYISME** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:33 am

kageyuki wrote:
TOSG wrote: Daniel isn't yet an alcoholic. It requires years of fairly constant alcohol abuse to develop a physiological addiction to alcohol. He's merely abusing alcohol as a sort of psychological crutch. While still a really bad situation, pulling himself out of it would not require the same sort of life-changing and drastic measures that overcoming alcoholism does. He's just got to get his head straight (unfortunately, he'll probably have to stop drinking before doing so...vicious cycle).
I have to disagree with that... I understand what you mean, but if this way of thinking is continuously used as a basis between being and not being an alcoholic... my uncle could have just as conveniently used that as an... "excuse" to continue drinking when the rest of the family tried to urge him to go to AA. Of course it wouldn't have mattered since he got himself killed in a drunk driving accident.

Alcoholism is alcoholism whether it's just the onset of it, or binge drinking and abusing alcohol. Either way, a problem is still a problem. BTW binge drinking and abusing alcohol (like the way Daniel is) are two of the most popular ways to get caught up in alcoholism, so why hide that? Why not just call it alcoholism, from there? I'd be willing to bet that more people would take it more seriously, that way...

True, Daniel may just need to set himself straight, but to do so (like you said,) he has to lay off the bottle.

I would have to say this post is very true. I am the daughter of two alcoholics and my older sister is an alcholic. I never wanted to be that, but when u realize u reach for a beer everytime you have a problem you have to change. I changed. I declared myself an acoholic at 16. I had only been drinking for 6 months, but none the less I was abusing alcohol. Daniel needs to wake up. He needs to use his friends to help him. Stop reaching for a bottle and reach for your friends. I alos know that that is alot easier said than done. I wanna see Daniel get better, but I don't fell sorry for him.

mincartaugh · Post by **mincartaugh** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:44 am

CRYISME wrote: I am the daughter of two alcoholics and my older sister is an alcoholic. I never wanted to be that, but when u realize u reach for a beer every time you have a problem you have to change. I changed. I declared myself an alcoholic at 16. I had only been drinking for 6 months, but none the less I was abusing alcohol. Daniel needs to wake up. He needs to use his friends to help him. Stop reaching for a bottle and reach for your friends. I alos know that that is alot easier said than done. I wanna see Daniel get better, but I don't fell sorry for him.

Congratulations, Cry. How long have you been sober?

CRYISME · Post by **CRYISME** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:46 am

four years! I'm about to turn 21 on mon. Sometimes its really hard! But you do what u have to do.

mincartaugh · Post by **mincartaugh** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:48 am

Congratulations and happy birthday!

It would be so great if I could convince one of my younger brothers to quit. These days we never see him sober. How do you tell someone they need help when they gave up listening to you years ago?

CRYISME · Post by **CRYISME** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:49 am

Thank you!! Monday will be a hard day for me to survive.

mincartaugh · Post by **mincartaugh** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:52 am

Oops! Sorry about that I thought I could squeek in an edit before you answered. My bad.

It would be so great if I could convince one of my younger brothers to quit. These days we never see him sober. How do you tell someone they need help when they gave up listening to you years ago?

CRYISME · Post by **CRYISME** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:58 am

The last thing you need to do is push push push. Because as it was brought up in this forum alcoholics are very quick to make it as if its just all in ur head and they don't have a problem. You only have a few options: (I learned this in AA)
-Leave him alone and let him hit the bottom. As hard as it sounds an addict can only get help if they want it.
-Try and get him to go to an AA meeting with you. Support him in it. The people at the meetings are really down to earth and really nice.
-Remember it is a disease. As much as he might want to put down the bottle he feels as if his body and soul need it.
-Don't take the excuses he will always make for it.

mincartaugh · Post by **mincartaugh** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:07 am

Thanks. That really helps.

CRYISME · Post by **CRYISME** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:11 am

If u ever need anyother help with this feel free to pm me. I have countless books and pamplets.

Sappho · Post by **Sappho** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 3:34 am

CRYISME wrote:The last thing you need to do is push push push. Because as it was brought up in this forum alcoholics are very quick to make it as if its just all in ur head and they don't have a problem. You only have a few options: (I learned this in AA)
-Leave him alone and let him hit the bottom. As hard as it sounds an addict can only get help if they want it.
-Try and get him to go to an AA meeting with you. Support him in it. The people at the meetings are really down to earth and really nice.
-Remember it is a disease. As much as he might want to put down the bottle he feels as if his body and soul need it.
-Don't take the excuses he will always make for it.

You are very wise. My ex-spouse is an alcoholic. He didn't listen to anyone. I put my foot down about the drinking and so he ran off with another alcoholic. Our son became a teen alcoholic, just like his father and paternal grandfather. I am convinced it is genetic in that family. I wouldn't let him smoke or drink, being underage. When I caught him, I told him he had to stop. He too ran off.

Now my son can't get drunk, because alcohol will kill him. He inherited a gastrointestinal disorder from his father's side of the family. I'm sorry he missed a few years of his life by drinking, and that drinking worsened his disability.

My son had to hit rock bottom. It was literally life or death. Some alcoholics with other illnesses keep drinking despite the terrible pain and early death. My son chose life. I couldn't choose for him. I couldn't lock him in his room and force him to be sober. When he left, and in the following years, I felt like the worst mother on earth. Now I feel that the values I tried to instill in him, of compassion, creativity, and reverence for life, remained, and triumphed. He's in nursing college now and getting straight As. I am very proud of him.

mellie3204 · Post by **mellie3204** » Fri Apr 20, 2007 6:52 am

Wow, excellent acting, great video.

watching_watchers wrote:I don't feel pity for him but I do think that Jonas took the wrong approach.

I think Jonas is doing what he thinks will work best here: getting daniel at the point when he's feeling most drunk/hungover, and provoking him into firing shots at him. I think he just stands back and films Daniel going for it because when Daniel actually watches himself saying this stuff, he'll feel really, really guilty, and realise that the drinking is just a mask for all these problems he's burying and that pour out of him when he's provoked.

I hope so, anyway.

watching_watchers wrote:I'm not exactly taking Daniel's side either, because it isn't right for him to be handing his problems and feelings this way, but I really think he needs Bree right now and shes not being there for him at all.

Speaking as someone who had to continued living in a share house with my best friend who was going through addition-like situation as and after I broke up with them, I found that being 'hard' with them was the only way I could protect them AND myself. I didn't want to give them false hope, or anything beyond friendship. I gave plenty of friendship but after everything has been talked out and the other person still has feelings for you, it's really hard to do anything but wait for them to get over that themself and stay out of their way while they do.

Besides, we don't see everything that goes on here. Only 3 minutes out of their day.

And just because Bree isn't showing any pain, doesn't mean she's not feeling it. Eveyone deals differently, and in the scope of life pain, she's the one who's actually lost everything. Daniel could go back to his life if he really, really wanted to (he wouldn't do that to the others though). Bree has nothing left at all. I don't think we should be so quick to judge. I know when I was protecting myself in the situation I mentioned, I hated how hard I had to become to not breakdown myself, and that was just in terms of what was happening with my best friend and new ex. Pile all the other stuff going on in this story on top...

longlostposter wrote:Don't forget that Daniel is stuck with Bree because he got himself involved with her situation with the Order, and now he can't get himself another girl. I mean, what female would put themselves in the position BJD are in?

Exactly LLP

TOSG wrote:He's merely abusing alcohol as a sort of psychological crutch.

I also agree here, though I don't think you can say 'merely'

.

longlostposter wrote:Daniel was raised by alcoholic parents, and was basically left to raise himself. I think what kind of home life a person had has a lot to do with how they react to things.

I think so too: Daniel is feeling pain and he's dealing with it the way he's learned how, to run away from it into alcohol oblivion. And that's a vicious cycle that has to be stopped as soon as possible.